Condom Use Continues to be Stigmatized

Condoms can prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections, but use of condoms continues to be stigmatized. This comes from social settings, media outlets, and even the limitations of sex ed in schools.

It’s too difficult to purchase condoms at the store.

At some local convenience stores, condoms can be found in locked display cases or behind the clerk counter. This is to deter people from stealing them, but it also deters people from buying them. Young people, especially, may be too nervous to ask for help purchasing condoms, and in small towns this could seem even more embarrassing for fear of the store employee knowing them or their family personally. 

Young people may not know there is no age limit to purchasing condoms at a store and believe they have no other option besides stealing them to access protection. Sexual health education could help address this issue by educating young people on other places to access free barrier methods, like youth-friendly clinics, and inform them that there is no age limit to purchasing condoms from the store. Ultimately, barriers to using barrier methods limit the safe choices teens could make.

We hear about misuse of condoms in music media.

Dababy has a song explicitly called No Condom, where he talks about having sex with his partner without protection because “that’s how she told me she want it.” He also states in the song that he “don’t need no new baby mama’s” which is interesting because that implies he has had sex without condoms before, resulting in unexpected pregnancies with other women. 

You would think he has learned his lesson.

A favorite 2009 throwback, I Love College by Asher Roth, includes some “rules” that he learned in college including “Don’t have sex if she’s too gone, When it comes to condoms, put two on.” While the first line is an excellent reminder that consent cannot be given if someone is too intoxicated, the second line perpetuates a barrier method myth that we try so hard to help young people unlearn. Two condoms are not better than one, in fact, that can cause friction and cause them to break. Here’s to hoping college students today know better.

There are plenty of songs that reference using condoms for protection, but even those songs often discuss sexual exploitation, perpetuate mistreatment of women, or encourage risky sexual behavior.

Condoms are hardly present or the butt of the joke in tv/movie media.

There are plenty of movies and tv shows that reference sex. Euphoria, Mean Girls, Friends, … and these aren’t even the shows that focus on sex. But what is missing from the implicit or sometimes, explicit, scenes about sex? Protection! There are little to no references to condoms or protection in shows where sex is included, but not the focus.

Then there are movies and shows where sex is the focus, like Big Mouth , Fifty Shades of Grey, or Sex Education, and condom use may be explicit or implicit. But these shows often utilize humor in a way that can be distracting or stigmatizing when it comes to condom use, and the movie representations are hardly realistic. 

Example: Mean girls. Instead of the scene where Coach Carr tries to pass out condoms (which we would say is an unrealistic expectation for health class), I want to bring attention to the scene where Regina George’s mom offers condoms to her daughter while Regina is already vigorously kissing her partner. It’s funny because it’s so unlikely a mom would really offer that, but do we get to see any normalization of condom use? We need media that includes condom use as a regular part of the experience without making it a joke or utilizing it for a plot point.

Condom use skills are not prioritized in wellness education for young people.

While we teach medically accurate and age appropriate condom use skills in the classroom, not every young person in Oklahoma receives this level of education. Too many young people grow up and never have condoms normalized, making it more difficult for them to feel comfortable using them when needed. Even lessons that only discuss when and why to use condoms are not enough. Safe and shame-free examples of how to use condoms are necessary to destigmatize condom use.

Condoms are a powerful tool for pregnancy prevention and STI prevention, but only if they are used correctly and consistently. The key to proper use is destigmatizing condoms in the settings mentioned above, and providing judgement free and shame free education on healthy sexual decisions.